Caught Up in the Creative Process

I am an over thinker.

I spent the last hour or so thinking about this. This overthinking habit that I have. I knew it was one of the many double edged swords I bore as a person. I like the concept of thinking. I like creating new things and exploring new avenues of thought. I consider myself a story writer after all. No matter how good or bad a concept ends up being I enjoy thinking about it.

The part of the sword that usually cuts me is giving certain thoughts life. I just get so caught up in the idea that the final product could never measure up. These words that I am writing currently had a fifty-fifty chance of being written. I kept thinking about what I should write and it usually takes me a good while to get to this point. If I decided to pursue something else instead, the ideas that I am currently writing would have a lesser chance of making it on paper. I think about it and think about it but sometimes it never ends up happening. The more common case however is that I start and decide that I can’t continue. The next line or the next paragraph might have me shaking my head. I write a couple more words and stop unable to continue with what I think is pointless drivel. Who would care about this anyway? There’s no way I could resurrect this sentence. Microsoft word keeps telling me that the last word I just typed is incorrect. Is it a spelling error? A grammar error? Must correct instantly but now I am unable to continue with the rest of the document.

I lost my flow. I’m out of steam. I’ll probably come back to it later.


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